LVMPD - Domestic Violence - Power and Control

There is never an excuse for domestic violence. It, like any other criminal behavior, is a choice. Social scientists examining the issue of domestic violence, however, have found that it has become a learned or habitual behavior.

The Duluth Wheel map of violent and non-violent behavior was devised by the Duluth Domestic Abuse Intervention Project, Duluth, Minnesota, USA, as part of its program to help men convicted of domestic assault to modify their abusive behavior toward mutual co-operation with others. The program is facilitated by a group of peers who use the Wheel's "map" to help participants identify their own violent behaviors, who consistently remind participants of their responsibility for violence, and who model alternative behaviors and alternative solutions to conflict.

The "map" divides violence into eight sectors: coercion and threats; intimidation; economic abuse; gender-privilege; isolation; using children; minimizing, denying and blaming. The respective target behavior for each sector is: negotiation and fairness; non-threatening behavior; economic partnership; respect; shared responsibility; trust and support; responsible parenting; honesty and accountability.

CONTROL AND ABUSE (destructive)	EQUALITY (constructive)
Using coercion and threats	Negotiation and fairness
making and/or carrying out threats to do something to hurt threatening to leave her, to commit suicide, to report her to welfare making her drop charges making her do illegal things	seeking mutually satisfying resolutions to conflict accepting change being willing to compromise
Using intimidation	Non-threatening behavior
making her afraid by using looks, actions, gestures smashing things destroying her property abusing pets displaying weapons (such as knives)	talking and acting so that she feels safe and comfortable expressing herself and doing things
Using economic abuse	Economic partnership
preventing her from getting or keeping a job making her ask for money giving her an allowance taking her money not letting her know about or have access to family income	making money decisions together making sure both partners benefit from financial arrangements
Using emotional abuse	Respect
putting her down making her feel bad about herself - calling her names making her think she's crazy playing mind-games humiliating her making her feel guilty	listening to her non-judgmentally being emotionally affirming and understanding valuing opinions
Using gender privilege	Shared responsibility
treating her like a servant making all the big decisions acting like the 'master of the house' being the one to define male and female roles	mutually agreeing on a fair distribution of work making family decisions together
Using isolation	Trust and support
controlling what she does, who she sees and talks to, what she reads, where she goes limiting her outside involvement using jealousy to justify actions	supporting her goals in life respecting her right to her own feelings, friends, activities and opinions
Using children	Responsible parenting
making her feel guilty about the children using the children to relay messages using visitation to harass her threatening to take the children away	sharing parental responsibilities being a positive non-violent role model for the children
Minimizing, denying and blaming	Honesty and accountability
making light of the abuse and not taking her concerns about it seriously saying the abuse didn't happen shifting responsibility for abusive behavior saying she caused it	accepting responsibility for self acknowledging past use of violence admitting being wrong communicating openly and truthfully