Get Acquainted With Your Issues

In law enforcement we become so accustomed to putting on our game face that it becomes habit. When things happen in our personal lives we tend to keep that "nothing bothers me" attitude. When we don’t want to feel the pain of life we stuff it. We don’t like to show weakness, so we stuff it. Twenty years later, the pack on our back weighs a ton and drags us to the earth. Still, our standard answer to anyone who asks is "I’m fine". Everyone has a backpack, but how full, how heavy or how colorful your pack is, that part is up to you.

Imagine walking down into Grand Canyon. The hike in is steep and dry but you plod along. The color changes with every bend and echoes across the canyon walls. You feel suddenly small, dwarfed by the power of the canyon. Your pack is manageable and you hardly notice it amidst the scenery.

Then the path turns uphill and weight becomes an issue. Like a six hour stair climbing experience from hell, you suddenly become aware of every extra ounce. Those on your thighs and in your pack. What if you added a rock to your bag at every switchback? Sounds dumb but that’s what we do to our emotional backpacks when we stuff issues and say "not now".

When we were younger our packs were lighter and more colorful. We had no jobs or mortgages, less issues and life was simpler. We played more. Had more energy. Now we have more toys, more bills, and less time. People die. Relationships fail or just fade away.

The world will teach us that we merely need to buy a bigger pack, get a cushier hipbelt or stronger compression straps. More stuff sacks so you can compartmentalize your issues and keep them from spilling onto one another. Don’t walk toward the pain, avoid it. Be happy, try not to dwell on it. This advice only compounds the problem.

You can’t put a full water bottle in the freezer because it expands and will explode. Like the water, our emotions need some extra room to swell or they too will explode. We all will experience tough times, usually when we least expect or have time for them. If your emotional backpack is already stuffed beyond capacity there’s no room for trauma.

Unloading your backpack is as simple as practicing good stress management. So simple that we don’t want to believe it will work. It involves talking about our emotions, slowing down, and seeing the bigger picture. Take a class. Read a book. There are a lot of stress resources out there but learning to unload your pack is up to you.